Monthly Archive for August, 2008

The Dude Finds Himself Disrespected At Work And Has Had Enough.

Published on August 24, 2008 in ..The Dude and Life. 0 Comments Tags: .

  So I’m not much for carrying on about work to people in print or by spoken word.

 I prefer to make my feelings known through the medium of claymation when it comes to work and home problems. Of course you all remember my memorable exhibition titled A Puppet’s Reverie On TIme And Attendence.

  But I return from work a short time ago after a few hours of paperwork and supply shopping in advance of my having off most of the rest of the week other than an overnight Monday and a few hours Thursday afternoon.  THis is to compensate me for the bucket of hours I’ve been doing without the solace of overtime the past 2 work weeks. These hours happened due to out anual hell week at work when everyone who lives in the facility I manage takes off from work and does vacation. I won’t go too into details but trust me it’s an unfair week and I’ve done tings very few people much less managers would do.

But do I get the promised relief that kept me going? No. Does anyone show any frakking appreciation for working multiple double shifts including being on my own on a trip to Brooklyn Friday? Uh uh. Do I get any love for handling an impossible scheduling nightmare for the week down 3 staff? Course not. How about a nod to the fact that my ideas for the way such a week should work were ignored yet another year and still I was the one having to deal with the untenability of the situation others created?

  Fuck no.

  Instead I go in today and find a memo to all staff that the other manager wrote. Probably in cahoots with our IRA Coordinator. It said that he will be doing all scheduling now and that all requests for time off, adjustments etc will go through him.

  Now understand that I’ve been doing most of this for the better part of 2 years without issue. All these type schedule related issues are handled by both of us but I’ve been doing more and more of it. Without a problem. People have noted how good of a job we do in staving off OT and not leaving staff in rough scheduling binds as many managers do.

  So one week where I had to wait and send in schedule to the agency’s scheduling coordinator late happens and I walk into this after spending 19 hours starting Friday morning at 7 driving to and in and driving back from Coney Island.

  19 fucking hours!

  And yet the night before, on a day I was supposed to be resting after two previous double shifts while everyone went to the Bronx Zoo, I was expected to be there to babysit and clean up when some guys were brought back early.

  But I wasn’t there.

  Now bear in mind that trip was my idea. THis was the glamour trip on which some administrative people tagged along and the one I had been looking forward to the most. But I had to remove myself because we needed my coverage in other places and the way everything had been put together by Jarmar, the other manager, it was my only opportunity for a breather. So I bowed out and let everyone including your fancy ass Social Worker, NUrsing head, and team Psychologists enjoy the day.

  So these latter people bring a few guys back early because they didn’t want to deal with working past 6 or 7 and expected me to be there waiting. Now why would I sit there doing an evening shift with no one there? Yet I did go in at 1 anyway to tidy up receipts and finalize some Brooklyn tickets stuff. Then of course things piled up and I end up there for 5 plus hours attending to other things there and at one of their programs  because no one else would. Then I go home to try and get some rest knowing I have to back at 7 for big solo staffed day Friday.

  And yet these fuckers expected me to hang out and babysit. I get the call just as I’m falling asleep for a pre dinner nap and am pushed into going over until 11 when everyone else returned and nightshift came in almost simultaneously. So the nursing head, psyche, and social worker can get home in time to catch Office repeats or whatever. And get rested for their Fridays. So I get no nap. No dinner. One of many days I had to eat crap at work because I don’t have the time or money to eat normally. So that’s taking a toll on my health as I feel like crap and I’ve had no more than 4 or so hours sleep in any night for about a week and I do mother fucking yeoman’s duty with this thing Friday.

  Yet because they were inconvienenced and because Jarmar, the other manager neglected to tell me they were bringing anyone back early, I get embarrassed by a fucking memo? I get scapegoated because of others bad ideas and intransigence when it comes to looking at other ways to handle the situation. People are going to think I was neglectful and untrustworthy on the admin level and people in our program are all signing this memo that seems a clear shot at me.

  I actually almost passed out at the wheel Friday, spent over an hour lost in Brooklyn and on the way back had some kind of eye attack in rushing Manhattan-GW bound traffic up the West Side and Henry HUdson. Couldn’t keep my eyes open. Felt like hot needles were being stuck in them and there was nowhere to pull over and I’m in the middle lane with no letup to my sides. So my eyes are blinking like mad and tears start streaming down my face and I’m thinking “it’s fucking friday and that’s one of my days off so I’m not even supposed to be here today,” yet I’m in the midst of 19 straight hours and about to get us killed in the City or at best stranded with a wrecked vehicle and it’s after 11 and I still have 2 hours of driving ahead even if I get out of this.

  WHich i did. And I go in there today to find this fucking memo which I’m sure was a response to those aforementioned fancy asses whining about no staff there Thursday when they got back from the zoo and possibly me sending schedule in late for the first time ever. All of which I gave heads up on but no one listened or bothered to take a closer look at.

  And yet it still would have worked down 3 staff and with all the doubles and no OT allowed. It mostly did work. THanks to me mostly and among other things my flexibility and willingness to take on Friday alone and for that long under some seriously crappy stress and lack of sleep.

  And I get fucking slighted like this?

  So what to do now?

  I want to quit. Can’t do that. Could resign my position and demote myself. Definite possiblity right now. Between this and my screwed up home life I am way too stressed and unhappy and I know things on the latter front can only get worse. I’ve got no respite anywhere, no place to escape or get some sense of rejuvenation or counter balancing softness amidst all the hardness. So why kill myself at work? I think I may have to finally put an end to this current run because it’s too much alone and I can’t get rid of the non work stuff.

  I’m still reluctant to go back to working the old shifts though. THey’re limiting and I like the flexibility of my schedule. Ironically it’s a schedule that would have made my life a lot better a couple of years ago and further back. Now though the sweeter things in life seem mainly moved on and having reasonable hours that allow for more time for those things seems  a cruel twist only slightly less predictable and badly conceived than the endings M Knight Shamalan’s last few movies.   

  But you know, I don’t want to swallow what’s left of my pride. I deserve better than shit. I work my frakking ass off and do so without a shred of asssistance in any area of my life.

  But a demotion, even a self imposed one, would also be a swallowing of pride as well. And most of the time we get along well at work and things are ok. But if feels like time for change is coming. Want to go forward and there only seems to be movement available backwards.

  So that’s my public whine. I drink it down and swill it around in my mouth. Now I spit it out into yours and don’t even care that it’s dead air out there and nothing else. Everyone knows a fine whine can still be enjoyed alone without being a lush.

The Dude Posts Random Thoughts In A Particular Order And Continues Referring To Himself In The Third Person, A Phenomenon For Which He May Be Blaming The Boondocks

Published on August 16, 2008 in ..The Dude, Films, Humor, Television and Uncategorized. 2 Comments Tags: .

In order of most important? Alphabetical? Funniest?

No.

The following thoughts are listed in the order most likely to save the world.

Begin:

Two fairly hyped comedies have come out the past week. Both were pretty well reviewed as these things go. I speak of Pineapple Express and Tropic Thunder. I’ve seen them both. And I have to say if, as has been put forth by writers of greater acclaim than I (meaning they were acclaimed at all), these are the funniest movies of the past year, I think it is no wonder I don’t laugh much anymore.

THis should probably make me feel good. I was worried my life had stripped me of whatever receptivity to humor as well as ability to engender laughter I had. But maybe it’s not me. Maybe there just really isn’t anything all that funny out there. If this is the apex than Sweet Bloody Christ-Stick we’re an unfunny people.

I guess it’s possible the worried about decaying of my own sense of humor and wit could be responsible for not thinking these movies are brilliant comedies. But I still think I have some review chops and good instincts left over even if I lack the hope, meaning, and purpose that used to drive them. And these aren’t great movies. And judging by the crowds I saw them with I wasn’t the only one not prostrate with guffaws.

And if you’ve ever been prostrated by a case of the guffaws you know what a bittersweet affliction this can be.

Now neither of these flicks was horrid. Pineapple Express is a stoner comedy from the Freaks And Geeks alumni associated with Judd Apatow. It’s in that vain. Apatow’s movie’s themselves have been acclaimed as the great comedies of our time. THis generation’s John Hughes.

If so I weep for the future.

That’s a line from a Hughes movie by the way. If 10 people read this maybe 3 will have known that. If they are under 30 probably none of them will.

But who cares? Life moves on. Moves pretty fast even. Fine. But still if these movies are someday looked at as the Breakfast Clubs or Ferris Bueller’s of their time I gotta think we’re missing something and great comedy may now only be found on You Tube and Fox News.

And perhaps at the Country Music Awards.

Seriously, just the idea it. Awards for the best Country music!

Shit that’s funny stuff.

Anyhow, Apatow’s Superbad was very well thought of last year along with Knocked Up. Both were ok. Really, really ok. But Knocked Up was pretty boring upon a second viewing on cable recently and Superbad rarely prostrated me. It was a mostly guffawless experience even if a modestly pleasant one. It’s pleasantness I suspect was mostly due to Michael Cera who kicks all kinds of ass and who deserves to fuck every starlet in Hollywood starting with Megan Fox who he should impregnate and then force to give the baby up to Angelina Jolie in return for Cera letting Jolie fuck him too.

Speaking of him, Juno even got an Oscar bid. Solid movie. Labeled a comedy. But again, not especially a prostrating experience. Same goes of those I watched it with in a theater in Rheinbeck. And if anyone knows comedy it’s the 6 figure salaried folks of Rhinebeck god damn it! I mean their Hannaford is so freaking clean and stately it’s got to be some kind wry ironic joke. These are a gifted people. And yet there was just appreciative chuckles.

Chuckles i say.

But I heard Juno talked of as a Say Anything for this generation. And I could kind of see that. But I still couldn’t help thinking this is sad. Say Anything wasn’t hilarious but it’s eternally quotable. Will youngsters today be quoting Juno 20 years from now? Probably not. They’ll have their work cut out for them just keeping track of all Michael Cera’s love children as they start coming of age and impregnating starlets at an exponential rate that future mathematicians will have to come up with a formula to track. This formula will feature the critical equation MC= S x F squared where MC is Michael Cera and S and F starlets and fucking that Cera has done.

Squared.

And at a velocity to be determined by his mass at the time.

If you know what I mean.

Anyway, back to recent well received comedies. I saw the first Harold And Kumar movie recently. Netflixed it.

With all these recent comedy viewings of mine you can probably tell by now that I have been pretty desperate to find something to laugh about here. And laugh I did. Occasionally. And decidedly without prostration.

When the fuck is someone going to do something to my prostrating needs!?

But the White Castle movie was still pretty damn formulaic and the humor nothing all that special. And yet it, along with the aforementioned comedies are highly thought of. At least for their time. So that’s why I wonder if we’re in unfunny times and if that’s contributing to my inability to form a smile.

______________________

Anyway I will touch on the Tropic Thunder controversy and say that protesters, and this includes my old agency UG-ARC (as I found out tonight from a friend who works there), are really a bunch of whiny ass liberals without any sense of humor.

Now this may sound hypocritical in light of the previous passages of this post as well as my own ill formed attempts at humor in said post. But these people haven’t even seen the movie. It’s really not taking shots at retarded people. It’s making fun of Tom Hanks, Dustin Hoffman, and all the other pretty boy actors who turn in sugar coated version of the mentally retarded that have little to do with reality. But of course ours is a culture that deals in reality the way a cat deals with a mouse: pounce on it, kill it, consume the evidence and call it a meal.

Or something more analogous.

People don’t want truth and Hollywood is glad to not give it to them.

But some of these self involved do gooders want to sway people from seeing a movie because they’re more liberal about retarded people now than about free speech. The Simple Jack and whole “full retard,” segment was one of the few truly funny and observant aspects of the movie and these idiots want it removed!

So is all me or are we dispossessing ourselves of real humor? Did Carlin take it with him? Fuck even he wasn’t always that funny. But he prostrated me at times and damn it what more can a man ask of another?

Back to retarded people: I frakking work with these people. Manage a program of 10 of them. I truly care for some of these guys. Have affection for them even. And the “full retard,” segment with Robert Downey Jr and Ben Stiller rang true and was damn straight on funny. Also echoed things I’ve said about Hollywood depictions of the mentally disabled.

And let me just say this now that I bring him up: Robert Downey Jr is the most watchable actor in film. Bar none. He rocks. Without him this movie would have been a total waste of time. The other great moment came with his “For 400 hundred years,” speech to the other black actor, an actor probably destined to be known as that other black actor despite being the only black actor. This in itself is a bit of genius that redeems a movie that needed more funny and less blowing things up.

Speaking of good parts. Pineapple Express’s crucifixion joint was pretty funny. So was “Fuck Jeff Goldblum.” A few other things as well, but this still wasn’t as good as an episode of Freaks And Geeks of which this could have been a mini reunion of with just the two freaks Rogen and Franco getting together and possibly not remembering that they hung out together in school and had a band before one became a seller of weed and the other a process server who smokes a lot of it.

But is was ok. And that seems to be good enough today. I’m ok, you’re ok, we’re all ok. But I don’t feel ok and though I’m not prepared to blame this on Seth Rogen or Ben Stiller, or even that Kumar fellow who was a terrorist on 24, I am serving notice.

___________

Journey taught us how to love. Indeed how to believe. And what have we given them? Nothing.

I think this is wrong and I intend to do something about it. Sometime in the future you’ll be hearing more from me about the Journey Fund. It’s a non profit set up I’m creating to give back.

To Journey.

I’m hoping to pass out donation baskets at concerts and then move on to movie theaters. Hopefully we’ll even get a big advertising spot somewhere in Fenway Park.

Because it’s about time.

For god’s sake they had to regroup, make another album with new material, and go on tour. Without Steve Perry!

And the new guy sounds just like him!

This a tantamount to the pagan worship of other gods and false idols. Thou shalt not worship other Steve Perry’s. It has been written. Or should have been. At least on a bathroom stall somewhere or something. The movie can’t go on and on and on without Perry. He wrote the fucking movie!

Clearly these are musicians in need for they have resorted to desperate measures that may doom us all.

So when the collection basket comes around won’t you please welcome it with open arms before we go our separate ways?

_______________

Been watching 2nd season Boondocks and it’s seriously fucking with my mind. I’m walking around talking about stacking my paper, my hoes, and having to fight very big urges to greet people at work with, “what up my nigger?” I don’t want to be one of these appropriators of black culture that the show itself as well as RDJ sort of make fun of in Tropic Thunder. But god damn it’s cool like a motherfucker up in here!

________________

Speaking of tv there are some new shows I’ve discovered a bit late in the game but have caught up on or am catching up on. One is Mad Men. Pretty heavy look at the world of the early 60′s to this point and the insides of a Madison Ave advertising agency and the people who work there. THe show is that kind of show where you may not want to watch because it sounds boring but when you start watching you can’t stop. It’s riveting the way a peep hole is riveting. It’s like listening in on the lives of real people you sort of wish you were but who wish they weren’t.

Entourage. About to start it’s 5th season next month I’ve been catching up. After initially watching most of season 1 a year or so back and not getting into it all that much I’ve become a bit addicted to it during the run of watching seasons 2-4. Really fun show with a nice whiff of realism. And Jeremy Piven is the man as Ari. Ari should be Michael Cera’s agent and help sign him to lucrative deals to fuck and impregnate starlets. Because that’s what Michael Cera needs to do and Ari would understand this and get it done.

The Wire. Still on the first season. Really well written as far as realistic dialog and situations. It does seem a bit pretentious in its disdain for conventional drama at times. I mean, I want a little entertainment value. if I didn’t I’d go try and become a Baltimore cop.

I do see why it got such critical acclaim though and appreciate it for those reasons. But I can also see why no one watched it and it didn’t get nominated for any Emmys. But I’m still early in to it and if there is one person out there who reads this and decides to wait to get into it until after The Dude has passed final judgement, i will try to not let you down.

____________________–

And back to the greatness of Robert Downey Jr. In a recent interview he had the following to say about The Dark Knight:

“My whole thing is that that I saw ‘The Dark Knight’. I feel like I’m dumb because I feel like I don’t get how many things that are so smart. It’s like a Ferrari engine of storytelling and script writing and I’m like, ‘That’s not my idea of what I want to see in a movie.’ I loved ‘The Prestige’ but didn’t understand ‘The Dark Knight’. Didn’t get it, still can’t tell you what happened in the movie, what happened to the character and in the end they need him to be a bad guy. I’m like, ‘I get it. This is so high brow and so f–king smart, I clearly need a college education to understand this movie.’ You know what? F-ck DC comics. That’s all I have to say and that’s where I’m really coming from.”

Agree or disagree this guy is awesome and should have lots of babies. IF he were a woman he would be a perfect genetic incubator for Michael Cera DNA. But he, at the last, is a man. And a magnificent one who must merely stand side by side with Cera as sexual avatars of our humorless age.

The Dude Sees The Dark Knight Again And It Makes Him Feel Less Funny Inside But Still Makes Him Wonder If People Will Be Ultimately Disappointed With The Movie Even THough He Is Less So.

Published on August 2, 2008 in ..The Dude, Films and Reviews. 1 Comment

So I had a hot lesbian-less screening of the top grossing opening weekend film of all time. And I liked it better. Sure hot lesbians are great. But I didn’t spend my $9 to be teased by them. I spent it to see Chistopher Nolan follow up my favorite Batman movie ever. One that washed clean the dirt put onto my soul by the stupid and evil Tim Burton and his successors as well as the ego fest that was Jack Nicholson being Jack Nicholson while playing The Joker.

Mmmm hot lesbians……

I digress.

Upon a second viewing I was able to appreciate some plot points and follow the crime story angle more fully. And it worked better; for the most part. I think a lot of people are going to find this part of the film too crime procedural and if so they’re not going to love the movie or return for further viewing as I did. Lesbians or no lesbians. I’ve already heard some discontent regarding that aspect of the film. I understand it and felt some of it myself. More so the first time I saw it than the next. I can’t blame that all on the lesbians. The movie is more complex than your average superhero movie and…..

Mmm I wonder where they are now……the lesbians I mean.

Concentrate!!!

I think many people are like me in that comics and the movies they spawn have become a more satisfying mythology for a more secular age. We want gods and heroes and the old time symbols really don’t cut it anymore. For all the criticism of the last Superman I liked it because Supes had that aura of the exemplar. He still felt like he was a selfless and benevolent power who was greater than us despite his unexplainable and ongoing Lois Lane fetish. Maybe his mom was a bitchy, selfish and dismissive whore. I don’t know. Just think Superman could do better. So could Clark for that matter considering he’s the same guy except for a pair of glasses.

Digressing again.

Ok, so I think most people go to superhero movies to be wowed and for a sense of wonder. They want that uplifting Superman score of old as our hero does something we can’t do and elevates the human condition. Let’s face it, comic books are to a large extent a replacement for religious mythology. Much of that old time myth making and hero making was about creating an image of man to aspire to and to lay the groundwork towards finding the greatness in us; or at least imagine it’s in us for that time we invest in the characters or in the case of religion the church of choice and its chief tenets.

Superman can leave me feeling awed in the presence of something greater than myself. Religion doesn’t do that for me so I turn to the new myths like comics, tv and movies. Now Batman has never been that archetype of total goodness and selflessness. And The Dark Knight makes him darker and less heroic that usual. In doing so the movie didn’t have that sense of wonder. The dark side of it is ok with me. I was always attracted more to Batman than Supes growing up because of that dark and more human side. But in a movie which is a rare event you kind of want some spectacle and magic and TDK is in many ways more of a crime procedural and exploration of character.

The Dark Knight really isn’t going to offer much in the way of the kind of uplift your average audience person is expecting when they step into a hyped superhero movie. Not in an obvious heavy handed way that modern audiences seem to need to feel like they’re getting it. Besides being a crime procedural it’s also playing with some ideas regarding the nature of heroism that are a bit obtuse. It’s debatable how much value there is in this exploration since ultimately this is still based on a comic book. Despite some comparisons it’s not The Godfather II. There are limitations in the comic universe. As good as Christopher Nolan has been at grounding this series in something approaching reality you’re steal dealing with characters and basic themes forged in 2 dimensions with its origins in black and white comic book subtext.

Now I should warn Bob or anyone who has not seen this movie that the rest of this post will probably have plenty of spoilers. So stop reading now.

Modern comics have advanced a lot on the depth of storytelling though. Hell, Time called The Watchmen one of the 100 greatest novels of all time. And The Dark Knight is a modern Batman by way of the Frank Miller inspired tales that offer more depth and substance along with more darkness. But it’s still based on a guy who runs around in a bat suit chasing after a guy with clown paint and another who flips coins to decide things because his face is split in two.

Nolan does a great job in making all these characters feel as 3 dimensional and plausible as possible. But there are still times when I feel like I’m stretching my credulity a bit. Harvey Dent’s coin feels most definitely like a comic book contrivance. His transformation into a villain felt far too sudden and rushed. And the payoff with Batman’s decision to become the villain so Gotham could keep its heroic symbol just feels a bit arch and unmerited. I like the idea, I really do. I think it was a dramatic turn and that it offers nice possibilities for part 3. But to buy it as a real necessity within his world I think you have to buy into the premise that Gotham is full of fragile drones that would fall apart without a symbol, even a dead one.

I’m coolish with allowing Batman to become a truer hero by taking the fall and letting everyone think he’s a villain. That endgame is all good. But getting there and feeling good about that destination would have required a little more convincing that Gotham’s citizens are an emotionally fragile and needy bunch of pussies.

Personally I’m not one for the idea of modern major metropolitan cities being that uniformly unstable. I might buy it more if you kept the comic-y Gotham of the first movie or even the evil Tim Burton’s. But in the Gotham of Dark Knight which is actually Chicago with that sense of real City expansiveness and depth, it’s somehow harder to buy.

On the other hand it’s easier in TDK’s Chicago-Gotham to buy people not being on to Bruce Wayne as well as the Joker being impossible to find without Bruce violating civil rights. In the Burton or Batman Begins Gotham there’s sense of claustrophobia and surreality to the city that feels like it could conceptualize some fragility and cloistered myopia of its citizenry. Those Gotham’s had a more otherworldly feel and so it would be easier for me to buy into the populace having abnormal responses and dependencies like the isolated and abused wife or child that is still emotionally dependent on the abuser they live with and the methods of abuse.

But those other Gotham’s also felt small and lent themselves towards feeling like everyone, including its media and law enforcement would have to be a bit retarded to not figure out that Bruce Wayne is Batman. But in a real metropolis like NY or Chicago which is the city of TDK’s Gotham, even a billionaire can get a little lost and have room to maneuver. People would occasionally figure it out, and someone does in TDK, but it’s not the can of corn it felt like it should have been in the other Batman incarnations.

Plus with Gordon on his side the police were never going to look that hard. Until now at least.

And even if the method used by Batman to violate Gotham’s privacy seemed a bit dubious, it makes sense that he’d have to resort to it to find a madman like The Joker amongst a city of such vastness. And finding him, along with that crime procedural in which he hid himself and his intent was well done and had a legitimate mounting tension really heightened by a good score. Hopefully in time that score will become even more associated with TDK’s building crescendo of tragedy and less with a mounting interest in how far two hot lesbians are willing to go right in front of me.

Mmmm mounting lesbian tension…..

Be strong Dude.

Ledger was great if debatably a tad self-indulgent. But he definitely steals his scenes and brings a contradictory sense of chaotic purpose to the role and to the movies themes. I felt a little unresolved as far as he went. Wanting closure.

Not unlike with the lesbians.

And I think closure may have come later. With The Joker. Not the lesbians. Nolan said Burton made a mistake in killing his Joker inferring that he wasn’t going to kill him for a reason. And Ledger was supposedly signed for a third movie. So I think they were going someplace else with him. Unfortunately his storyline will never get full closure now.

And in honor of him I end this review without any either.